Sunday, October 6, 2013

Days of JOY


It's now been a little over 4 months since Hannah Joy Yao Yao joined our family. One third of a year seems so long and so short at the same time. The time has flown by, and we are now fully into our new normal. Maternity leave ended with the summer, and full time work has begun. Hannah has transitioned into a wonderful center based childcare where there is stability of teaching staff and peers (her teachers have been there 21 year and 7 years, which is incredible for people working in child care). Now, she loves it. The beginning days were tough for both of us, as she would cry silent tears when dropped off. At pick up, she always flashes her beautiful smile and comes running, exclaiming "mama always come back Yao Yao". With each passing day at her childcare, she experiences the return, and is getting more confident that mamas do indeed, come back.

Hannah has transitioned well to an American diet and gained 6 lbs since coming home. Her rate of language learning is incredible, as she speaks in short sentences. She can tell simple stories. A few days back, she went to child care with a head band and came home without it. I asked "what happened to your headband"? She said "fall down toilet. Off head. Splash. All wet. Yucky. Toilet paper. Get out." Priceless.

Hannah's sleep continues to be somewhat challenging, which was expected due to the transition to child care. Most nights, she is still restless. She will panic if she finds that I am not in the bed next to her, crying the most heartbreaking cries which stop the moment she hears my voice again. The scars of loss of her birth family, even if made in loving effort to give her a chance at life, still carry forward with her. As my 4th child through adoption, I acknowledge the reality of her abandonment and try to be mindful of her past experiences while hoping for continued healing of her sweet little heart.

Many people ask me "how do you do it?" (ie manage 4 kids as a single parent). This question really makes me laugh. Just do it. It's not an option to just sit around in bed all day. Life is for living, and I intend to do just that. Time flies by, and before I know it my children will be raised. So for now, we embrace the chaos. We laugh at Hannah's face covered in melted chocolate, and expect that times are going to be messy. Getting five of us out the door before 8:00 in the morning is a feat that always challenges and yet, we somehow do it. The laundry piles up, the floor gets sticky, and there is often a stray dirty sock under the kitchen table. But I wouldn't trade it. We find joy in all of these things, and in so much more, as we live our days together. Days of joy.

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